For generations, men everywhere think that they know it all about three little letters—S-E-X. Sorry to burst your bubble, but there’s still a hell of a lot more to know, which is why we’re here to help squash and misconceptions.

We’ve dug up a bunch of information to help you really become an expert in the sack, so take this as your sexual bible, helping you get her off, having you last longer and knowing how to leave her happy.

Foreplay! Foreplay! Foreplay!

If we’ve said it once, we’ve said it one million times—foreplay is the key to having the best sexual experiences. That’s not just an subjective statement, either, but actually backed by research! According to new research from the Kinsey Institute and Chapman University in Indiana, there are three things that a man needs to do in order to get his lady off—and it has nothing to do with vaginal penetration.

  • Genital stimulation
  • Deep kissing
  • Oral sex

In addition to those three things, foreplay shouldn’t just be about what’s happening in the moment, but should be continued throughout the day—so send those raunchy texts and Snapchat those dirty pics, fellas!

Do Your Exercises… And Last Longer

It’s no secret that “training” yourself how to last longer is a good way to, you know, actually have sex for more than a minute or so. For that reason, don’t laugh at the thought of it, utilize it! We’ve given you a bunch of tips on how to last longer, but kegel exercises might be the most common—and effective.

Here’s a quick review of what you can do:

  • Tighten your pelvic floor muscles, hold the contraction for three seconds, and then relax for three seconds. Try it a few times in a row. When your muscles get stronger, try doing Kegel exercises while sitting, standing or walking. Maintain your focus.

Much like a workout, you won’t just see instant results from the new exercises for your junk, but, over time, you and your partner will appreciate them.

Get Kinky

You may not be into that whole bondage scene, but you might want to reconsider and at least do some light BDSM—because there are plenty of health benefits when done with someone both people trust, so says Patricia Johnson, award-winning co-author of Partners in Passion: A Guide to Great Sex, Emotional Intimacy, and Long-term Love.

“If someone is going to bind your wrists or tie you to a Saint Andrew’s cross and flog you, there has to be a high level of trust at work. This is also why you should seek instruction before trying anything but the mildest forms of kinky play.”

Additionally, when BDSM is done with a trusting partner, kinky sex has shown to have a positive impact and actually help bring couples closer together, as it releases endorphins in the brain that can be compared to other thrill-seeking activities like sky-diving and bungee jumping.

Know Your Positions

There really are an abundance of sex positions that you and your partner can try to make your love life even hotter, but there are a few that are better than the others when it comes to getting her off. We point those out in this piece a few months ago, but the one every man should focus on the most is reverse cowgirl.

Since reverse cowgirl hits a bunch of angles and nerves inside of her—while also giving her the control to move her hips back-and-forth or left-to-right—it’s super stimulating for a woman, resulting in orgasms more often than not.

Cuddle With Her Afterwards

This is something you’ve probably heard for years, but, for some reason, men continue to forget about this after actually having sex. According to a new study published online in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, while sex has shown to make people happier, it’s actually the time spent cuddling after sex that made people happy, not the orgasm.

“When engaging in sex, people not only seek an intimate connection, but indeed experience more affection, both when having sex and in the next several hours,” explained the researchers, The British Psychological Society reported. “Hence sex seems not only beneficial because of its physiological or hedonic effects, but because it promotes a stronger and more positive connection with the partner.”

So, yeah, if you want her to come back for more—and not think you’re a creep—put in a little extra time by cuddling up on her.