Long Story Short
Researchers have explored why some women make more noise than others during sex and have revealed ulterior motives for cries of apparent ecstasy.
We all think we know what good sex sounds like, and it’s a cacophony of moans and shrieks of uncontrollable euphoria. Or at least that’s what Hollywood has taught us to believe.
But in reality, there may be quite a different reason why some women make a lot of noise during sex. It’s not so much that you’re a love god, it’s more that she wants you to feel like one.
In a 2011 study in the Archives of Sexual Behavior by Gayle Brewer of University of Central Lancashire and Colin Hendrie of the University of Leeds, 71 women between 18 and 38 were quizzed about the noises they make in the bedroom.
It emerged that 66% of women made sounds to speed up their partner’s climax (so, effectively through boredom) while a whopping 87% admitted their screams of passion were an attempt to boost their partner’s self-esteem.
The study of “copulatory vocalization,” to use its technical name, has suggested that women making noise during sex is either for the benefit of their partners or due to a conscious or unconscious pressure from the images they see on TV.
In fact, rather than being a sign you’re hitting all the right places, moaning may indicate that you’re doing quite the opposite.
Kristen Mark, a sexuality researcher at Indiana University, told CNN: “We’re bombarded with images through mainstream media that tell us moaning is associated with orgasm and sexual pleasure. So it would be a fairly wise faking strategy to moan since men already tend to associate moaning with orgasm.”
Alas, the field of copulatory vocalization studies doesn’t get the funding it deserves, so there’s still a lot to learn about the phenomenon, but experts have stressed that if men need to hear cries of pleasure to feel comfortable, so do women.
So even if both of you are putting on an Oscar-worthy (or at least porn-worthy) performance, faking it may be the best option.
Own The Conversation
Ask The Big Question
Is there really a way to tell if she’s faking?
Drop This Fact
A recent study by Cosmopolitan found that only 57% of women usually have orgasms with their partner and 67% of women have faked an orgasm.